The Goss

Your bestie is across the country and you can’t sit with them, drink beverages of dubious nutritional quality, and discuss the shit they weren’t there to talk you out of? Your sister’s dating someone unpleasant, and you told her his beanie looks like a condom tip, and he’s a chronic mansplainer who gives you bad vibes? For whatever reason, the goss partner in your life is unavailable, and you’re dying to hear something spicy?

Honey, don’t even stress. I was born without a filter. Sometimes the tea I spill is over 200 years old and about Mary Shelley’s love life, but that’s means it’s fermented and contains alcohol.

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And second, Guys.